Surrendering

I've been wanting to discuss TV again for some time now. I've recently done something nearly unprecedented - I've removed two longstanding shows from my schedule. I talked in a previous post about my chart and categorization, etc. I'm going to show you my chart as it currently stands.

This is the fewest number of shows I've watched in I don't even remember how long. It's a whole new world for me. Biggest Loser and Supernatural are gone from my spring schedule. A year ago, I don't think it would have even occurred to me to remove a show I've watched for as long as I've watched Supernatural. But things, they are a-changing.

I used to fear the changes God was making in me in this area. I didn't want to give up the shows I love; I didn't want to surrender things I felt so attached to. It terrified me. I was obedient up to a point. I would pray for change but ask to keep certain things - I didn't want to go all the way. Even then, He helped me along, helped me to let go a little bit at a time, but I was resistant to it so it wasn't what it could be. I can't put my finger on when exactly I changed enough to want to change, but now I welcome it (in this area, anyway.) I've slowly been inching my way along this path, afraid to end up in a place where I don't know who I am anymore. Lately, though, I've started praying fervently for change. 

The first time I asked Him to remove anything that was before Him in my heart, I did it full of fear and reluctance. But every time that I ask, I feel stronger in my resolve, more secure in who I am in Him and more ready to let go of the things weighing me down. And things are starting to shift. I think it started with Glee. You may remember how much I adored this show last year. It quickly became my favorite show, but like many things that come on suddenly, it began to fade just as quickly. I don't know if it's the show or if it's me - probably a combination (I know I'm not the only one wondering where the plot went this season), but I just don't care like I did. I still watch it, but I've lost the need to see it right away. I usually tape it now and watch it several days later. It's still cute and the songs are still fun, but the need is gone.

Then Supernatural. Poor show. I watched it faithfully, but I just don't care enough anymore to tape and watch it every week, or to keep up with it online. That's what Netflix is good for, anyway. Then I just couldn't tolerate the manufactured drama of Biggest Loser. I tried to stick it out for Jillian's last season, but I couldn't take it anymore, and I don't miss it at all. I'm not a fan of the reality genre anyway, so that one was easier to let go. What's more, I find myself pondering what will go next and when. Not if - it's definitely when. It's probably going to be Chuck, which I've started to find quite repetitive. After that, I could see giving up Bones, maybe The Office after Steve Carrell leaves, and perhaps, at some point, Glee. And inside, there's a strong part of me that is excited about not having so much of my time taken up with these commitments. I feel relieved at the prospect of having more time of my own to focus on the things I love and the people I enjoy spending time with. And the shows that I truly enjoy watching every week. Like Vampire Diaries, which is just a fabulously good time every single week! But that's a story for another time.